Poopin' Around Town

A guide to where to poop while out and about primarily in and around Boston, MA.

Wednesday, January 31, 2007

Top Of The Hub - Boston, MA

Top Of The Hub - 6.1


Located on the 52nd floor of The Prudential Tower in Boston's Back Bay, Top Of The Hub is a classy restaurant with a view of all of Boston. 759 Feet above the ground, you'll also fine live jazz bands an assortment of well made yet pricy adult beverages. The Pru is located at 800 Boylston St.

Location: Once out of the elevator, the restrooms are immediately to your right. Go down the hallway which lies a few feet before the hostess and the bathroom will be on your right. There isn't any signage that I saw. So it's easy to get to if you know where it is (doesn't that sound like something John Madden would say?)
Grade: 6 out of 10

Accessibility: This bathroom is surprisingly accessible. Since it's location is before the hostess, you should be able to walk right on in, especially if it's a little busy.
Grade: 9 out of 10

Number of Stalls: This restroom has only two stalls, when you'd expect a bit more considering the capacity and lack of other restrooms nearby. Looking for a little more here...
Grade: 4 out of 10


Stall Quality: The stalls were nice, with a big closing door that doesn't reach the ceiling or floor, so there is good airflow. It's also a large stall, though it doesn't have much in the way of features. It was nice, but for some reason, I was expecting nicer.
Grade: 6 out of 10






Toiler Paper: The toilet paper was ok. If you're sensing a bit of disappoint disappointment here, you are correct, a place this nice should have a nice toilet paper set up, with some pretty plush TP.
Grade: 5 out of 10

Cleanliness: The bathroom was mostly clean despite the renovation that seemed to be going on. There was no sign about it, so I'm simply assuming that some sort of construction was underway. All in all though, it was clean.
Grade: 7 out of 10

Scent: Not much of a scent to speak of, though again, in such a pricy and classy establishment, you'd expect something pleasant.
Grade: 5 out of 10

Flush: This flush was ok. It was automatic, which is partially great and partially an adventure. Sometimes it takes a while for the toilet to swallow and digest so to speak. I can never figure those out!!
Grade: 6 out of 10

Aesthetics: I figured there would be something to look at or keep me occupied here and there was nothing. For some, that's a plus. This being a classy establishment, it seems ok to leave the restroom as simple and plain.
Grade: 7 out of 10

The Bottom Line: The fine folks at Top Of The Hub aren't going to leave you in dire straits. At the same time, it'd be great to see them put in a bit more effort and make the bathroom top notch. A few more frills would go a long way. When it comes down to it, if you're going to #2 at the highest possible place to do so in Boston, shouldn't it be as enjoyable as possible?

Side note: How does the poop travel down from the 52nd floor?? That's quite a trip!

Friday, January 26, 2007

The Other Side Cafe - Boston, MA

The Other Side Cafe - 6.0



The Other Side Cafe is one of Boston's finer dive bars. Featuring a wide selection of beers and reasonably priced food, The Other Side has developed a reputation with beer snobs and punk kids alike. If you're looking to avoid over-priced, frat filled BU/Boylston St area bars, this could be the place for you. The Other Side Cafe is located at 407 Newbury St at Mass Ave. in Boston.

Location: After you walk into The Other Side Cafe, the Bathrooms are directly ahead of you. Might have to fight through a small crowd to get there, otherwise it couldn't be simpler!
Grade: 8 out of 10

Accessibility: The Other Side Cafe is 21+ as it is a bar, though it might be possible for someone underage (not recommended!) to sneak through. Outside of that, you're in the clear, none of the staff here would bother you.
Grade: 7 out of 10

Number of Stalls: There are two bathrooms, shared by patrons of both sexes and everything that might be in between. If they're occupied, you might be in Tee-Rubble.
Grade: 4 out of 10


Stall Quality: On this night, The Shit Critic used the bathroom to the left. The bathrooms here are individual rooms that are reasonably sizeable. There is one toilet, a sink, a coat hanger, a trash can and not much else (not that there could be much more). We'd prefer if there was a urinal, but all in all, not bad.
Grade: 7 out of 10





Toiler Paper: This toilet paper wasn't the best. It was two ply that had started separating and didn't look all that nice to start. At least it's covered up, right?
Grade: 4 out of 10

Cleanliness: For a dive bar, this restroom was pretty clean outside of the normal stuff you'd expect like a few pieces of toilet paper on the floor. Either the staff does good work, or the patrons are quite respectful...
Grade: 7 out of 10

Scent: No real scent here, though if need be, I imagine the window could be opened. There weren't any preventative measures, so there is some potential for disaster on this front.
Grade: 5 out of 10

Flush: The flush here was relatively weak for a standard 6 LPF toilet. I certainly wouldn't drop off all the kids at once, or see how much toilet paper can fit in this puppy. They do provide a plunger though.
Grade: 5 out of 10

Aesthetics: One of the finer points of this bathroom is the art in it. As you can see in the photo's above, the bathroom is painted with characters and creatures quite colorfully. Seems to be that the fine folks over at Urban Monsters have taken some time to make the restrooms there a bit more colorful and pleasant!
Grade: 9 out of 10

Extra Credit:
Plunger: +1
No Paper Towels: -3

The Bottom Line: Not a bad bathroom at all, perhaps one of your better late night options in the area, especially if you're just wearing jeans and a t-shirt.

Saturday, January 20, 2007

Outback Steakhouse - Medford, MA

Outback Steakhouse- 6.7


Oh, the Outback Steakhouse. You are fine dining for college students and young professionals with no money here in the US and abroad. Between the Bloomin' Onion, the 22oz beers and fine selection of steak, you've gained a reputation around the world for good service, good food, good portions all at a reasonable rate. This particular Outback is located at 672 Fellsway in Medford, MA.

Location: The Blokes room is a bit difficult to locate. Once in the restaurant, pass the hostess and walk past the bar area. Once past the bar, take a left and you'll be in the right place. This is the back left corner of the restaurant. The Sheilas room is there as well.
Grade: 4 out of 10

Accessibility: If you've been to The Outback, you know that they have a hostess. If you're waiting for a table I'm sure they'd be glad to let you use the facilities, if not you might be able to sneak by or just walk in as if you're taking a seat at the bar. Should be ok.
Grade: 6 out of 10

Number of Stalls: This Outback had two stalls, one of which is a handicapped stall. There were also two urinals leaving plenty of options for those who don't need to #2.
Grade: 7 out of 10


Stall Quality: The handicapped stall is very sizable while the other stall is quite a bit smaller. All in all they even each other out. The handicapped stall is much nicer.
Grade: 7 out of 10

Handicapped Stall

Non Handicapped Stall


Toiler Paper: Very nice toilet paper set up, locked up very tightly! It was also plentiful, no worries here...
Grade: 8 out of 10

Cleanliness: Some normal restaurant paper towel type mess. That said, the restroom has an over clean type of feel.
Grade: 7 out of 10

Scent: The smell in here was actually noticeable pleasant. They do have a mechanical bathroom spray device. It seems to be doing a bang up job!
Grade: 10 out of 10

Flush: Be careful here as the flush in both toilets was noticeably weak. I'd also warn that one of the toilets was clogged. There was a plunger located under the sink, but that might not be the most help.
Grade: 3 out of 10

Aesthetics: They've definitely made an effort to make this bathroom seem a bit friendly. They have a nice soap set up with nicer soap than usual and paper towels nicely laid out. They even make it kid friendly with a stool in case they are not tall enough for the sink (or the urinal for that matter).
Grade: 8 out of 10

Extra Credit:
Plunger: +1

The Bottom Line: If you're at the Outback and need to relieve yourself be confident that their facilities will get the job done. Beware of the weak flush, if you have a larger than usual delivery for the toilet, you might want to break things up into a few flushes if possible.

Tuesday, January 09, 2007

Four Seasons Hotel - Boston, MA

Four Seasons Hotel - 9.2




Overlooking the Public Garden and Beacon Hill, and within easy reach of every notable business, entertainment and cultural attraction, Four Seasons Hotel is characterized by elegant simplicity and old-world Boston Charm. These qualities also make it a very convenient and attractive destination for those is need of a Number 2 break. If you've got extra time and an empty stomach, spot into the lounge fro a Bristol Sirloin Burger. Four Seasons Hotel Boston is located at 200 Boylston St.

Location: We prefer our bathrooms in a lower traffic area and this one fits the bill. Head left in the lobby toward the lounge and head up the grand staircase. You'll find the facilities just ahead to your left.
Grade: 9 out of 10

Accessibility: If you can play it cool and don't look like a crazy street person, you should have no trouble. If you can't play it cool and do look like a crazy street person, you're probably more comfortable shitting yourself anyway.
Grade: 8 out of 10

Number of Stalls: There are two stalls with Full-length solid wood doors. These are rooms more than anything else. No flimsy aluminum walls here, you're entombed in solid marble and plaster.
Grade: 8 out of 10


Stall Quality: There's enough space for any gymnastic moves that you might incorporate inro your routine. We also like the coat hook on the door. That's a must have, especially in the winter months.
Grade: 9 out of 10




Toiler Paper: Two full rolls with the end sheet facing out, juts like we like it. We're not interested in having our paper brush the wall before it toushes us. The paper was held on spindle rollers, side by side. Simple and bulletproof. In a bathroom of this quality, we don't frown upon our paper being exposed to the elements like we might in a dingier spot. The ends were even folded into triangles to enhance the presentation.
Grade: 10 out of 10

Cleanliness: As it should be, this bathroom is spotless.
Grade: 10 out of 10

Scent: Are those fresh lilacs I smell?
Grade: 10 out of 10

Flush: The top-of range- TOTO had a flush like a jet engine. We wished we'd brought out bowling ball, just to see if it would go down too.
Grade: 10 out of 10

Aesthetics: Clean walls and bare surfaces may be boring, but they also add to our relaxation. If you need a distraction, you'd better bring something to read because there isn't much else to look at.
Grade: 7 out of 10

Extra Credit:
Toilet seat covers: +2

The Bottom Line: If you're in the area, this spot is definitely worth an extra bit of walking. The luxury accomodations provided by the hotel don't stop at guest rooms and dining. Just stroll in like you own the place and don't linger too long and you should have no toilet access issues.

contribued by: Inspecteur De Toilette

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